It's super standard to be running a bit below all in EV and I know that, but it's so tough to keep my confidence. I'm trying my best and today I played the best I've played all month, winning two buy-ins despite running around $2k below EV in all-ins. Right around the 1,400 hand mark for the day I was telling my brother that I'm finally running decently hot and then it proceeds to go downhill from there, lol. Basically, I had an OK day that could have easily been a monster day at 400NL.
I've made a lot of spewy plays and has some uncharataristicaly tilty sessions so far this month, so I think if I had played better I could actually be a lot closer to even at this point. Nonetheless, there's no point in focusing on such short term results. Even the past month and a half where I've been treading water isn't really all that big of a deal in the big picture of things. I'm just sort of venting my frustration and trying to turn my mindset positive.
It's so much more difficult to put in hours, play your best, and don't tilt when the times are tough at the tables. You realize that the times you get it in good and still lose you should be happy but getting AA all in pre-flop vs a maniacal villain who you've been 3-bet battling a bit with and losing to his AQ soooted still knocks a bit of wind out of my sails (actually happened today). I don't let it affect my play or get nearly as pissed as I used to, but I just can't seem to totally remove the emotion of frustration. Obviously other poker players feel these types of emotions as well, but the degree of frustration I feel while playing definitely needs to be reduced.
Times like these I question my career choice, but only for like 5 seconds after I realize the alternatives, lol. Big picture wise, things are still great for me. I'm moving to Chicago, still have a big bankroll online for 400NL even after cashing out a ton for my move, am healthy, have lots of great friends & family, and I'm still up a respectable amount for the year.
No matter what people say, in my opinion, anyone who can make a living from poker is very fortunate. I feel right now that I'm right in the middle tier of pros... I'm not a low stakes grinder earning slightly more than I would at a regular job... but I'm definitely not in the elite group of poker pros just yet. My game is good right now but it needs to be great, and I'm going to work my hardest to move into the top tier of pros as soon as possible.
Posts
Hey I played with you a bit in the past at stars cake and ftp. Read your blog today because I started running poorly at about the same time as you did and was interested to see what was happening. his is the second month where results have been crappy after a good 4 month run. Don't pay too much attention to your cake hands and all in ev and that shit. I have a friend who also said that his HEM isn't importing correctly from cake, either is mine. Good luck. I can barely stomach putting in 1.5k hands/day at this point.
ReplyDelete-little dice on cake
Thanks for the comment bud. Hopefully you start running better. I think I'm turning things around now, which is good.
ReplyDelete